Ready to Freeze

 It's spider time on my Kentucky acre,

just ahead of the frost next week.

They're frantically spinning elaborate orbs before they freeze to death.

It's poetic and awfully artsy, don't you think?

I hurriedly inspect these for any scribbled symbol or message. 

The smarter spiders choose to make their last stand in the 

hydrangea bushes. It's an excellent place to freeze.

This year, I have only one blooming Heavenly Blue Morning Glory vine. 

Last year's vine was extravagant, a year of blues I'm sure will never happen again.

Because last year, against my husband's better judgment, 

I allowed the morning glory vines to take over a small dogwood. 

The tree wasn't so happy, but I could blame all the damage 

on the cicada invasion. And I did. 

The first blue bloom opened today, somewhat late in the season. 

But much better later- than never-blooming. 

There's something special about those heavenly blues. 

Even their gracefully-twining vines and 

miniature buds hold unique charm.

You're charmed, right? 

Zoo Window

This tiny bird feeder is at the upper corner of the kitchen window looking out into the backyard.

We get an up-close view of any birds that visit - mostly tufted titmice and chickadees.

When this ginormous spider took up residence, I didn't mind. 

As long as they're OUTside and never  INside, that's cool with me.

My Youngest, who hates spiders as much as I do, insisted on going out with a broom

take care of the problem. He was horrified when I asked him to leave it. 

 Heck, it's like a zoo display right at my kitchen window! Every night it spins the most amazing huge web, then retreats to its hidey spot at dawn, just as we're getting breakfast and rushing out the door.

Did anyone notice the unsuspecting prey hanging out in a very dangerous spot?

Hey, Hey, Hey ...

... Goodbye! 

The furnace is on for the first time this season.

It's going to frost soon.

The end is near for all the spiders that dotted the landscape of my summer. 

 California Trapdoor Spider (shudder) found creeping around the foundation of our lake cabin in southern Kentucky.  It met an untimely death inside these plastic bags when bees drilled through and ate him.

I can't say that I was sorry, since I overheard one teenager say to another, 

"We'll take that home and keep it in a tank - great pet!"

I was innocently looking for a nice sitting spot - can you see that rock nearest the shore? Thank the Lord I had the sense to kick it before parking my bottom! Does this spider not seem so large? Keep in mind that I took the photo from plenty far away, and that I'm pretty sure I heard it hissing a warning about my bottom meeting its home.

This garden spider set up shop among the stems of the Yellowstone daylily in the patio garden.

Even I have to admit that it has a certain ... horrific beauty. Maybe?

If you enlarge the photo, you'll be able to see it even more clearly. It seems to have a hair-do.

I decided to nickname it Barbara, at the risk of cutifying a terror-inducing spider.

And since I really enjoy the show, I let Barbara live to the end of her natural life.

Tis The Season

It's Spider Season.

And the spiders are attacking. 

One almost as big as a mouse thumped around in here the other day. 

That's AFTER My Wonderful Husband sprayed Ortho Home Defense Max.

It may say KEEPS BUGS OUT on the tag, but what it should really say is, 

"Will cause every spider in the near vicinity to parade across your living room floor."

It's like the Go For It Spider Attractant.

That's my product review, unpaid for, unsolicited, and I'm not taking it back!

Lurker

Is this creepy or what?

A spider lurking in the Blushing Bride. 

ugh. 

shudder.

(I'm deleting this photo as soon as this post publishes.)

Spider Season

People are saying that since we had such a mild winter, 

there will be ALOT more spiders out this season. 

It makes me want to reach out and pinch their lips closed. 

Gently, of course.

I'm NOT looking forward to Spring Spider Season.

Especially that first incident.

The incident in which you find, to your complete horror and utter, unsuspecting shock, a BIG spider 

INSIDE, 

where it ought not be. 

Maybe under a shirt that's been tossed on the floor.

Maybe behind a chair you've moved while vacuuming.

Maybe in the bathroom sink! 

(shivershuddertwitch)

I found this spider shell in the greenhouse. 

It seemed to speak to me ... 

Spider Stardom

At the risk of never having anyone ever visit me again, I have to post this LAST photo.

This is it.

Maybe word has gotten around in the spider world that putting in an appearance at my house will result in spider-stardom.

What else could be going on?

WHAT???

This one was AT THE BACK DOOR this afternoon.

Literally with one foot on the entry door, having already passed under the screen door. Youngest Son opened the door to go feed the dog and found this on the doorstep ---

don't think I've ever heard the door slam that loud before. He did better than I would've, though, and Second Son bravely caught it for photos and much amazement, smugly calling us "babies".

NOTE TO ALL ARACHNIDS:

THERE WILL BE NO MORE PHOTOS OF SPIDERS OF ANY KIND

OR SIZE ON THIS BLOG

*Do not attempt to interview with the owners of this home!*

A Giant

I know I'm at risk of becoming the writer of a Spider Horror Blog.

But this is just too significant to leave out.

Too remarkable to NOT remark!

At least this one was not in our house! It lived out by the fire pit in a really nice, cozy hole in the ground. Lots of ideas went around about how to see just how big it really was, since we could only see its eyes glowing eerily from the bottom of its hole and the occasional stretching of a leg in our direction. The group settled on digging the whole hole up and forcing it out into this jar. What a tidy plan! ha. ha. ha. I'd post the video, but it's a little TOO real life. So for those of you not living the Real Life yet, I'll refrain.

You're welcome.

Can't pass up an opportunity for a good dare.

And this is about as brave as we get around here - with spiders, that is.

Husband suggested I trot the hairy bad boy (with 8 legs) up to the extension office for ID.

But I think I'll pass on a car ride with this mini-monster.

May this be the last spider entry of the year.

Screaming on Sunday

Sunday morning.

Taking the towel off my hair, turning on the light...

(screaming)

FYI - don't try to use a bottle of mousse to smash a spider this size.

You'll only break its leg.

Also, big spiders won't wash down the drain.

I have to add on that I've also found a spider in the washer this week. Hovering just at the top of the agitator, breathing heavily after surviving a normal wash at warm/cold temperature. FYI2 - don't try to use a box of dryer sheets to smash a spider in the washer. You'll only have to wash the clothes again - this time at extra heavy agitation, hot/hot water with an extra HOT rinse --- even if it happens to be a load of darks. I think it DID wash down the drain this time...

Is this spider abundance an insect conspiracy - an attack against me personally, the Spider Fearer? Can they smell fear? Or might these extra spidery visits in my home be due to SPRAYING AGAINST SPIDERS IN THE FALL SO THERE WOULD BE LESS OF THEM THIS SPRING? Did we pick up the wrong product at Lowes?

Spider Attractant, maybe??? Hmmmmmmmm